Mafia to Run NYC Charter School

May 27, 2010 (GBN News): The Mafia, which has recently taken an interest in funding innovations in education (GBN News report, April 30), will reportedly be opening a new themed charter high school in New York City this fall. The school will specialize in the study of criminology, from a non-traditional perspective.

A Mafia source described the program to GBN News as, “More vocational than academic.” The source went on to say that, “The kids will do a lot of hands-on learning, more ‘how to’ than theoretical. We guarantee that they’ll come out well-prepared for exciting jobs in the field, or else.”

J. Fredrick Runson, Dean of the Manhattan University School of Criminal Justice, is not surprised that the Mafia would want to run a charter school. “All those hedge fund guys are figuratively making a killing on charter schools,” he told GBN News. “The Mafia will do the same thing, only they can do it literally.”

Schools Chancellor Joel Klein told GBN News that he could not comment on the reported plans for the school, since “We’re in a delicate phase of plea bargaining – I mean, negotiations.” However, he did say that he is happy to work with any group that can run an effective charter school. “If they get good test scores,” he said, “Like any other charter school, we don’t care how they do it.”